Most of us really want to get along with others. It is human nature to prefer peaceful, constructive conversation. Communication breakdowns are frustrating and painful. Often they leave one, both or all parties angry, confused and hurt.
We’ve been trying to get across our messages since the day we were born. So why does it sometimes still feel so difficult? Whether partners, kids, work or anybody else…communication challenges are inevitable and as unique as each of us—however, this does not mean they must be divisive.
Here’s how to improve communication breakthroughs: 1) We really need to know who we are in our hearts more than some mental image of who we are. Hearts are not tough, right or firm. Conversely, hearts aren’t a pushover or too flexible, either. That’s mental baggage. 2) Our pulsating hearts are knowing and loving. Our hearts have to become the guiding force of our thoughts. This means we have to risk vulnerability… because 3) We must be willing to allow “us” as a possibility — to co-exist. So this means we must be open to adjust, reverse, switch, shift, transition, about-face, change…or advance our thinking to be open to “us” thinking, which comes from the heart.
While in our heads we can script out all that we need to say to get our point across, if we’re not willing to allow others to do the same, and then, are not willing to risk “us” thinking…the problem remains and the relationship falters. Exchange, liaison and rapport can only happen when we choose to embrace the possibilities of unity vs. antagonism & division. Communication cannot move forward with mental rigidity. This does not mean we must always concede: Rather, it means that we must be willing to be flexible vs. inflexible…much like a beating heart.
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