This is indeed a comically ironic headline from someone who posts photos of herself daily…but really…it’s the big secret behind my smile in every one of these photos. When I’m not smiling (read that frowning & hoping nobody sees), it’s because I forgot to practice this.
If we want to to feel better mood-wise & improve relationships, a win-win for all parties, the goal is to forget about ourselves & start recognizing that others see almost every aspect of life differently than we do.
“If we want to to feel better mood-wise & improve relationships, a win-win for all parties, the goal is to forget about ourselves & start recognizing that others see almost every aspect of life differently than we do.”
We each tend to view life from our exclusive perspective because we think it makes things easier. But does it? It might be temporarily convenient, but also possibly alienating & isolating. For example: If punctuality is important to us because we’re on a tight schedule, our anger is likely to arise the minute others are late. Suddenly, the fact that they may be an otherwise great person is obliterated due to their lateness —because we’re taking it personally & deeming this action inexcusable by our standards. Now they are “rude & selfish”…instead of just late.
Punctuality is important. But annihilating positive feelings about another due to our frustration with whatever behavior is irking us won’t resolve the punctuality issue. Rather at times like this, we need to pause & reflect: “Great person, lots of fun, but just seems to regularly miss the bus.” Point being: Relationships with other humans are inconvenient. Opting to let others ‘in’ means accepting that they will regularly bring other ways of thinking & doing things that will require more open-mindedness on our part, before we reject it. And, NewsFlash from those married 50 plus years: This fact doesn’t change. But their responses to each other do…if they want to stay married.
Our perspectives on life & others reflect our likes, dislikes & experiences. It gets down to this: To allow ourselves to sometimes practice forgetting ourselves is asking: Is the relationship more important than being right? Only you can decide.
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