When we’re feeling a lot of resentment towards others, it’s quite possible we’re caring more for them than ourselves.
While we may have caregiving responsibilities for aging parents, spouses, young children or disabled others — if we’re feeling overwhelmed by the load we’re carrying, it’s probably time to reassess the energy we’re spending focused on others vs. ourselves. Putting ourselves last on a to-do list is rarely a good idea.
When we’re spending too much mental energy trying to figure out what others need and want, or what they are thinking — our energy is no longer directed on what we need to do to become our best selves within that relationship. Instead, we are trying to help change others.
While it’s normal to want to offer our assistance to others, boundaries of appropriateness as to where that help starts and ends are important. Setting limits benefits us and, yes, others. Really. If we are constantly trying to figure out how to direct others, we are implying they are incapable. In a way, our egos have stepped into the relationship: Our behavior is both controlling and an insulting commentary on another’s capabilities and— we might even be clipping their wings, making them more dependent.
Relationships based on need rarely feel good. Doing for others is a gift we offer without expectations of return. If we’re thinking otherwise, it might be a good idea to assess stepping back and allowing another to figure out their own life without our help.
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@DianGriesel is aka @SilverDisobedience — the author of The Silver Disobedience Playbook ✨ I’m a Perception Analyst who shares my Daily Meditations for other Ageless, Passionate & Curious People. Modeling info @Wilhelminamodels —other info in my bio & on my websites.